23.5.11

Thank you for everything!
Really!
and yea, It happened, again~ Y^Y
Wonderful!
After so long, I decided to let my heart locked again!
It's been so long I use it and didn't give it a rest
Now,
for the sake of my future,
for the sake of my health,
for the sake of my feeling,
for the sake of my family,
for the sake of not hurting anyone,
for the sake of not being hurt,
I locked it again.
When will I let it function again?
This ... I would say :"till the day it feel it worth to"

This of course not for my family and neither to my friends
I am tired to be someone's someone
I should be just MYSELF
It's indeed my fault
I should have think it properly
I love my ex roommate!
This two times! She warned me a lot
I will listen to you next time I PROMISE

I know, I am a big trouble,
even my beloved parents said that,
what I choose to do would totally surprise them,
out of their expect and of course to my friends as well.
Good or Bad? depends~

I am selfish,
I am greedy,
I am weird,
I am who I am.

I can say there is never a person can change me if I don't want to,
even my family.
I rather a friend hates me or back stab me than I go after her like a puppy
That just makes her not even call as a "friend" to me

A bit go wrong way =='''
What I am trying to say is
"don't judge a book by its cover"
the quotation above I used to feel that it is for those childish kids,
to prove that they are cool and everything they done is not their fault and its under their control

However, now I feel I just need it to express
although I added something I feel childish as well
"don't judge a book by its cover and expect it to be something you thought of which in fact it is nothing of what you thought at the first place"
yea, it came like this.

Overall, It is not FULLY my fault
I m wrong as well as you

Now, my goal is
1. Finish degree with flying colours *this is a MUST*
2. Further my studies until I can officially work
3. Earn more money to take care of my parents, my grandparents, my siblings, my nieces and my DOG's future.
4. I want to be someone independent enough to hold the world by my own hands

20.5.11

How to decide?
Since there are possibility that it would happen again
how I gonna let it hurt you again?
Is not like I don't know you
I know you well, this is why I am so hard to make decision

7.5.11

Totally not in study mode!